Being an entrepreneur is not for the faint of
heart—anyone who’s tried to start their own business knows this. And being a
female entrepreneur in Silicon Valley takes that truth to a whole other level.
Being a woman CEO in a predominantly male
environment has taught me so much about myself, and what it takes to succeed.
I’ve been forced to learn lessons that all business owners need to master, and
more quickly than I expected, but the payoffs have been huge. Here are a few
nuggets of hard-earned wisdom—I hope you find them helpful:
1. Get out of your own way
I wish someone had told me this
sooner. Growing up, they teach you to be nice and kind, but no one ever
tells you how much you really have to believe in yourself to get ahead, and
what that really means. With so few female role models, I’ve had to learn to
trust myself. Positive self-talk is essential, but so is recognizing when
you have something new to learn. Embrace your disappointments and rejections,
and give yourself permission to be wrong or even fail. These are all
opportunities to grow. Learning how to trust your gut and being comfortable
with your own growth process are both invaluable.
2. Forget the traditional 9-5
Those days are gone. You’ll be lucky if you
get a 9-9. You wanted a non-traditional lifestyle, and you got it. Be
prepared to put in long and unusual hours, especially if you are dealing with
business partners in other parts of the world. Time zone differences may have
you on middle-of-the-night conference calls, or early morning contract review
sessions. The good thing is, you do make your own hours, so if you need to take
time off for a special event or just because you need a break, you have that
option.
3. Work-life balance isn’t just for women
We’ve all heard this conversation before, and
usually it’s in the context of women juggling family and career. But honestly,
this kind of balance is important for everyone, regardless of your gender. It’s
really important to have some kind of personal life that nourishes your spirit
and helps you take quality downtime. Otherwise, you’re liable to become very
unhappy, and, as a result, quite unpleasant to be around. (And that’s not serving
anyone!)
For me, this does often take the form of
spending time with my family, as having fun with them feeds my soul. No matter
what your happy place is, make sure you go there regularly and fuel up. Breaks
are important—they will help you be more productive and focused when you’re
working.
4. Learn to live in the moment
It’s important to do your best without
worrying about the outcome or beating yourself up about things you might have
done differently. Too often, we are so concerned about what will happen in the
future, or mistakes we’ve made in the past, that we end up short-circuiting our
current power. Each moment is an opportunity to engage your best self in the
process of learning, growing, and moving closer to reaching your goals.
I identify with the Buddhist philosophy about
what to do while waiting for Enlightenment: “Chop wood and carry water.” These
types of daily practices will define your next steps and tomorrow’s goals by
giving you focus and clarity. Maintaining this kind of constant awareness and
mindfulness, especially during the most mundane activities, can be challenging,
but it’s also very fulfilling. Give it all you got!
5. Take things one day at a time
I try to remember to be patient and focus on
little wins each day. This helps me to gain slow and steady progress. I learned
a lot about this when I began training and trying to lose weight. When I stuck
to a daily routine and took small, regular steps, over time I really began to
notice a difference. Operating this way requires a tremendous amount of
patience as well as confidence in your vision and your ability to reach your
long-term goals.
You’ll need to remember that some days will
find you taking a step or two backwards, but that’s natural. If you can remain
patient with the stop-and-start nature of the process, you’ll see yourself
starting to move forward again.
6. Allow yourself to be a work in progress
Nobody enters this game as a fully formed
expert. You are not handed a manual—you learn on the job, and that means
allowing yourself to take chances and sometimes fail. Don’t let your
perfectionism hold you back from trying new things.
I know that I’ve gained my greatest bits of
wisdom through my own personal experience. People can give you advice, but
there’s no substitute for learning by doing. Once you understand that you are
constantly evolving, you step into a really powerful place of being ready to
grow and respond to changes. And, as we know, the world is constantly changing,
so you’d better be ready to change with it.
7. Leadership is about cultivating strong
relationships
Forming a solid team is one of the most
important initial steps to creating a successful business. I cultivate
connections based on mutual trust and respect, with people who have the skills
to do their work, and then I make the space for them to do their thing. I
prefer to give my teammates what they need, create the kind of stickiness that
makes them want to stay and makes it feel like they’re not working, just doing
what they love to do. I do my best to create a trusting space where people can
be honest and express themselves. The ability to create this kind of openness,
where people can deliver their best, is, in my opinion, the essence of strong
leadership.
8. Become part of something bigger than
yourself
One thing that really helps me get some
perspective is doing service work. I like to spend time with older folks at a
local nursing home and senior center. It helps me tune into concerns bigger
than my own, and gives me a new take on my own hurdles as they relate to the
grand scheme of things.
Giving is actually quite inspiring on many
levels. If more people concentrated on what they have to give, rather than on
what they’re trying to get, the world would be a better place. Try paying it
forward with a little volunteer work—you’ll experience the surprising benefits.
9. Align yourself with a larger ecosystem
Your brand is your calling card. It’s also the
main tool you use to create relationships, which are at the center of all
business. Once you have a clear idea of who you are, connecting with other
brands becomes much easier, as you’ll be more easily recognized by others who
are operating on the same wavelength as you.
The best relationships come about between
brands whose messaging, core values, and objectives are all in alignment with
one another. If you can tap into the potential in these types of alliances,
you’ll find yourself creating a powerful business network that is capable of
lots of exciting, mutually beneficial collaborations.
10. Maintain your center
Startup life can really be a struggle
sometimes. It’s a roller coaster of emotions—highs and lows, mainly, and not
much in between. Pressure to perform can feel unbearable at times. I still find
myself up against traditional views of womanhood and the role of women in the
family, fielding everything from critical questions and sideways comments to
raised eyebrows. At moments like these, especially, you need to stay mindful of
who you are and what you need. Return to the basics of taking care of yourself,
your family, and your business, one day at a time, and remember to shut down
and take a break when you need one. Remind yourself, this is what you asked
for! Then take a deep breath, or two, or ten … and keep going.
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