by
Sally Herigstad January 22, 2016
Summary
The neighbor of a man with dementia went
to town with his card. After his death, it’s hard to distinguish theft from
generosity
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Dear Sally,
A woman (our next-door neighbor) used my father’s credit card when he was in the hospital suffering from dementia and other illnesses. After my father died, I took over his affairs and noticed $8,000 charged to his credit card two days before he died.
A woman (our next-door neighbor) used my father’s credit card when he was in the hospital suffering from dementia and other illnesses. After my father died, I took over his affairs and noticed $8,000 charged to his credit card two days before he died.
We asked the
neighbor, who sometimes visited my dad, if she had seen his wallet, but she
claimed she hadn’t. However, we eventually tracked the charges to her.
We explained the
situation to the police, and they charged her with theft and fraud. Now she is
in court claiming my father told her it was OK. All the charges were for her
personal use, property tax, her son’s wedding pictures and flowers. Will she
get away with this? — Donna
Dear Donna,
I’m afraid she may very well get away with it. Jordon Ostroff, a former prosecutor and currently a defense lawyer in Central Florida, has seen many cases similar to this one. He says, “It’s unfortunate, but it’s hard to disprove a story when one side is dead.”
I’m afraid she may very well get away with it. Jordon Ostroff, a former prosecutor and currently a defense lawyer in Central Florida, has seen many cases similar to this one. He says, “It’s unfortunate, but it’s hard to disprove a story when one side is dead.”
In fact, if Ostroff
had gotten this case when he was a prosecutor in Florida, he would have
withdrawn from the case. “The defense is going to get up on the stand and say,
‘He gave me the right to do that.’ There’s not enough evidence to support the
case.”
Neighbors can take
advantage of a situation like this more easily than your average identity
thief. They know the ZIP code and other information. They can influence an
elderly person or someone with impaired judgment. If they occasionally help out
and visit, they may easily rationalize helping themselves to recompense, with
or without authorization. It happens all too often.
That said, certain
facts may help your case against the neighbor. The fact that she initially
denied having the credit card seems odd. Ostroff says that it would help if you
had surveillance footage of her sneaking into the house or if some other items
were missing as well and found in that person’s house. The fact that money was
spent on the neighbor’s son’s wedding may also seem to weigh in favor of
prosecution.
You may also show the
neighbor knew your father had dementia and took advantage of it. Even with
dementia, some patients have moments of clarity. The case may be influenced by
how likely it was that your father was capable of authorizing the use of his
card.
On the other hand, if
your father and the neighbor got along very well, and your father knew his time
was almost up, he could have given his OK to the use of his card. Ostroff says,
“The neighbor may have said, ‘We’re having a wedding,’ and the dad said,
‘Here’s my credit card — go for it!'”
In hindsight, cases
like this illustrate why it’s so important to limit a person’s exposure to
financial risk when they are suffering from impaired judgment and dementia.
Ostroff says, “It’s tough, because the minute you take away a person’s
independence, they tend to die sooner. If having the credit card makes him feel
like he’s still there and still important, it’s a tough emotional thing to pull
that away.” Lowering the limit on a credit card, cutting back on the number of
cards or even just going to a debit card only can reduce the amount of exposure
an elderly person has.
I’m sorry you are
going through this at the same time you are dealing with the loss of your
father and all the issues that go along with that. However this case turns out,
I hope you can put this behind you and have a better new year.
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