Striving for connection along with a healthy dose of
self-care will get you through the season.
There has been a recent flood of research
statistics that affirm loneliness is reaching epidemic proportions in the
United States. One recent study by global health service company
Cigna clearly spells it out -- we are a society that is growing apart. Cigna's
key findings indicate that nearly half of adult Americans feel alone (46
percent) or left out (47 percent), two in five people feel that their
relationships lack meaning (43 percent) and that they are isolated from others
(47 percent). Their research also highlights the fact that Generation Z (ages
18-22) "is the loneliest generation and claims to be in worse health than
older generations."
Why is this happening? What we do know is that
a lack of human connection is increasingly affecting all generations -- and it
can hit particularly hard during the holidays. The festive season can be just
that, festive and full of enjoyment. However, it can also be accompanied
by intense emotions, including an overload of
social commitments with high expectations. The holidays can certainly trigger
episodes of loneliness if you've recently lost a loved one, struggle with family tension or have other life
challenges. But what's truly important to remember about the holidays -- and
all year long -- is that the meaningful connections and relationships we
maintain throughout our lives are crucial for us to remain healthy, and thrive.
What is clear is that people who lack human
connection, ultimately feel a lack of vitality. There are some solid practices to cultivate connection as well as other
methods to help quell loneliness. Here are a few to consider:
Cultivate gratitude.
Meditation researcher Dr. Joe Dispenza is
famous for incorporating the emotion of gratitude into all of his meditation practices. As he puts it,
"Gratitude is the ultimate state of receivership." When you are
mindful of your blessings and are grateful for them, you are also building emotional resilience, which enables
you to handle life's highs and lows with more
stability. Gratitude can also help you shift to a positive mindset. Take a few
moments each day to think about something or someone you are thankful for and keep
a journal to record these thoughts. The benefits of gratitude have
been studied in great detail, including better sleep, stress reduction and a
boost in mood. Ultimately, an "attitude of gratitude" helps rewire
your brain for enhanced health and happiness, and can strengthen relationships.
Volunteer and give
back.
Studies validate the benefits of giving, not
only for the ones on the receiving end but also for the ones who support those
in need. Benefits of giving back include feelings of happiness and wellbeing,
as well as inspiring a greater sense of purpose in life. There are countless
volunteer opportunities available -- particularly during the holiday months.
Volunteering is also a great way to boost self-esteem and may help you discover
talents you never knew existed within you.
Help bring people
together.
If your apartment building or condo organizes
a holiday party for residents -- offer your help. Or join a committee at work
to help plan a holiday celebration. Maybe you have elderly neighbors that would
benefit from a small social gathering. The idea is to come up with creative new
ways to connect with people. It might feel like a lot of trouble to execute at
first but when you break it down into smaller actions it becomes easy. Enlist
the help of others to accomplish your goal. If that seems too overwhelming,
make it your mission during the holidays to say hello more often or try asking
how someone's day is going -- in your neighborhood or at work. Not only will
you be making someone else's day, you will feel good about your efforts as
well.
Make self-care a
priority.
Self-care is never a selfish act. Taking care
of all four "dimensions" of wellness can
help you get a handle on feelings of isolation. The core areas of focus are
physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. Adopting activities such as regular exercise, healthy food awareness,
relaxation time, and energy management are all great places to start. The
avoidance of addictive habits, spiritual practices (such as meditation or
prayer), enjoying a good laugh, taking time away from work, and perhaps most
important of all -- enjoying friendships and social support from people who
care about you -- are all part of nurturing your body, mind and spirit.
Cut back on social
media.
While our reliance on technology has had a
significant impact on the way we work and spend our leisure time, it may not be
solely responsible for the increase of loneliness and isolation. (The Cigna
study reported that there was no correlation with regular social media use and
loneliness.) However, there are studies that
support the opinion that too much time spent on social media sites can
negatively affect your mental health. So strive for balance and remind yourself
that social media is just the "highlight reel," and not necessarily
based on what is really going on in people's lives.
Have a warm bath.
This advice may sound simplistic but science
backs up the statement that a "nice warm bath" will help you feel
better. Researchers have examined the link between physical temperature and
emotional state including decreased feelings of loneliness. According to one study, the
association between warmth and security is scientifically established yet many
are not aware of the link between feeling physically cold, and feeling lonely.
So if the "holiday blues" strike, try a cup of tea and a long warm
soak in the tub.
Talk about it.
If things get too tough, don't suffer in
silence. Always seek the support of family or friends you trust -- or find a
therapist or other mental health professional to help. Some resources are
listed, below. Remember, we humans are hard-wired for connection -- it's part
of our DNA. Don't deny yourself the opportunity to forge new relationships, and
strive to maintain the constructive ones that bring you joy.
National Institute of Mental health (NIMH)
Educational information
Referral Information
Educational information
Referral Information
American Psychological Association
Educational information
Referral Information
Educational information
Referral Information
American Psychiatric Association
Educational information
Referral Information
PUBLISHED ON: NOV 15, 2019
Educational information
Referral Information
PUBLISHED ON: NOV 15, 2019
The opinions expressed here by Inc.com
columnists are their own, not those of Inc.com.
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